Helping Your Child Become A Strong Competitor
As we approach the New Year and the second part in most sport seasons, I want to address two important and urgent issues. Hopefully, we as coaches can implement changes. The first deals with the still rising Burnout and Dropout rates in children and youth sports that is presently estimated to continue until age 17! Given the current statistics in the escalating number of inactivity, overweight, and obesity in both the USA and Canada, we have to search for better ways to keep children and teens physically active, involved in sports, and healthy for long-term quality living. Parents play a major role in this process to keep younger athletes motivated to remain longer in their respective sports. Here are some Guidelines:
Helping Your Child Become A Strong Competitor
Emphasize and reward effort rather than outcome, especially for younger children
Understand that your child may need a break from sports occasionally
Give your child some space when needed – allowing the child to figure things out for him/herself
Encourage and guide your child, not forcing or pressuring him/her to compete
Emphasize the importance of learning and transferring life skills such as hard work, self- discipline, teamwork, and commitment
Emphasize the importance of having fun, learning new skills, developing skills in his/her sport participation, and asking questions
Give unconditional love and support to your child, regardless of the outcome of the day's competition or game
Enjoy yourself at competitions or games – make friends with other parents, socialize, and have fun
Keep a sense of humor – if you are having fun, so will your child
Look relaxed, calm, and positive when watching your child compete
Realize that your attitude and behavior influences your child's performance
Have a balanced life of your own outside of sports
The ‘Parent Trap’ of Competition
Thinking of your child's sport participation as an investment for which you want a return
Living out your dreams through your child
Basing your self-esteem on the success of your child's sport participation
Caring too much about how your child performs
Doing anything that causes your child to be embarrassed
Feeling that you need to motivate your child – this is the child's and coach's responsibility
Ignoring your child's behavior when it is inappropriate – deal with it constructively so that it does not happen again
Comparing your child's performance to that of teammates or other children
Showing negative emotions while you are watching your child at a competition or game
Expecting your child to talk with you when he/she is upset – give him/her some time
Making enemies with other children's parents or the coach
Interfering, in any way, with coaching during practice or competition
Trying to coach your child – leave this to the coach or coaching staff